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Marriage - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Married Folks: Is Oral Se.x Neccessary In A Marriage To Build Trust And Love? / Definition Of Marriage To You? / What If A Girl Proposes Marriage To You? (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Marriage by ademotors166: 9:38pm On Sep 01, 2013
debrief08: My Brother, My first Marriage was in my early 20s, logic should mean that I would have been popping out kids but it didn't happen.
In my 30s I started producing like a rabbit, practically touch and carry belle.

Just make sure you both get tested if you are unsure.

Best wishes
Thank You ma. Your words give me encouragement.
Re: Marriage by Nobody: 9:51pm On Sep 01, 2013
ademotors166:
It is only my very close confidant, that know about the age and pregnancy issue.......(*we have also been trying for sometime now*)

Apparently you are worried. I feel jittery for this woman also the pressure from trying may be why she has not gotten pregnant.

1 Like

Re: Marriage by Nobody: 10:07pm On Sep 01, 2013
have you checked yourself out? or are fertility issues only associated with women!!!!!!!

you could dump her marry an 18 year old and 10 years later wonder why there is no child meanwhile this "old" woman can move on and have 4 kids with a mature man in the same 10 years.

2 Likes

Re: Marriage by RoyalRoy(m): 10:29pm On Sep 01, 2013
Just keep shooting, you will hit ur target soon.

No shaking!!
Re: Marriage by Coldfaya(m): 5:49am On Sep 02, 2013
Bro b careful not to attract what u fear d most. D way u so worried, it looks as tho u r already predicting infertility in ur sub-concious.

If u so scared about it, y not just relax, den try more n hit d target before tying d nut. Not d best advice but I think from d way u r sounding, u want to b convinced that u n her can procreate so mk her take in den get married.
Re: Marriage by longsam: 6:38am On Sep 02, 2013
If you have peace and God is in it,go for it.Remember when two agree as touching any thing on earth it will be establish.My bros learn to trust God.At RCCG convention this year,a 56yrs woman gave birth to her baby.Nothing is too late nor hard for God to do.
Re: Marriage by amtheone(m): 8:09am On Sep 02, 2013
debrief08: My Brother, My first Marriage was in my early 20s, logic should mean that I would have been popping out kids but it didn't happen.
In my 30s I started producing like a rabbit, practically touch and carry belle.

Just make sure you both get tested if you are unsure.

Best wishes

God is wonderful ohhh. Anty Debby I hope u have changed ur mind about that National Assembly stuff ohh, because there are even more funny thread now than that one. Lol

Have a fruitful week ahead.
Re: Marriage by Princesszoe: 1:45pm On Sep 02, 2013
ademotors166:
My dear, I understand you. But, if I get married and after some years no kid..... I wonder if my wife can withstand the pressure that will follow.
I know the pressure am facing now, cos am single.......and I can tell you it is not easy.
It's not just about having a happy marriage, it also above preserving the family name. At any event or gathering, someone must remind me that I am still single (imagine a woman being asked about kids at every gathering/function).
[b]My dear many families have gone through delay in child bearing and still came out of it victoriously. Spiritually, there is no guarantee that your wife will start producing babies almost immediately after matching down to aisle even if you marry an under aged girl but there is 100% guarantee that God does not leave His people childless. Nobody here can stick out his or her neck for you by betting that your wife will give birth immediately after wedding why because we are not magicians.

Every marriage has its own challenge and yours might be what you fear most. Even if such happens(God forbid), you must be strong for yourself and for your wife.You must determine not to open the door for the devil and oppressors. That is why marriage is not a child's play. If you lack the quality of fighting for your marriage especially when childlessness is involved then you should place your marriage plans on hold and deal with your poor qualities first. I pray that what you fear most, will not come upon you and that devil will not use it against you. Some men faced this and made it. please get your mind off it. Build resistant trait, build violent faith and above all,know that anywhere there is a rise, there is a price.
[/b]

4 Likes

Re: Marriage by ferhyntorlah(f): 6:09pm On Sep 02, 2013
ireneidiva: Don't get married. Just get a baby mama. You seem more interested in getting a baby factory than a woman to love and cherish. No woman deserves to be pressurised in this age and time into that sh1t.

Ireneidiva, GOD bless you plenty!!!!
As in ehn! The woman dey try oh; having to deal with a man with such mentality.

He's just interested in her for babies only; nothing else.

If you can't deal, please let her go so she can be at peace. This fear of yours is enough to stress you both. Stress affects conception, I hope you know?

I see you being easily influenced by family and friends in the long run; my only pity is the wife to be because she will be at the receiving end of your influential actions.

Shout out to the women who are married to only son; una dey try oh. GOD bless una oh.
Re: Marriage by babestell(f): 7:00pm On Sep 02, 2013
I can imagine what will happen when madam only has daughters.
Re: Marriage by Nobody: 7:15pm On Sep 02, 2013
ademotors166: YPP,
I didn't read what you posted before it being hidden. But I just went through your post history and found that your last post was the only hidden on in the page 1 of your posting history.
It must have been hurtful for the Mods to hide it.
Yes I saw ur post but couldn't reply u cos not only that my post was hidden seconds I sent it, I was equally banned. Funny isn't it?
I will still post the same thing I posted earlier that got me banned but maybe not word for word.

Stop using that analogy pls.
Its not true.
Remember the power of the mind and mouth.
It also seems u r pessimistic which is not good.
From ur posts I can see u hv some issues. I suggest u go and get good supplement to build urself up.
Also eat,rest and exercise well.

I wish u the best.

(Now this may not be d way I put it on the other post but this is actually what I sent to u) can anybody tell me what is wrong with this?(if actually its not hidden anyway)
Re: Marriage by deols(f): 8:14pm On Sep 02, 2013
yellowpawpaw:
Yes I saw ur post but couldn't reply u cos not only that my post was hidden seconds I sent it, I was equally banned. Funny isn't it?
I will still post the same thing I posted earlier that got me banned but maybe not word for word.

Stop using that analogy pls.
Its not true.
Remember the power of the mind and mouth.
It also seems u r pessimistic which is not good.
From ur posts I can see u hv some issues. I suggest u go and get good supplement to build urself up.
Also eat,rest and exercise well.

I wish u the best.

(Now this may not be d way I put it on the other post but this is actually what I sent to u) can anybody tell me what is wrong with this?(if actually its not hidden anyway)

the anti spambot banned you. You probably used some words associated with spam.



@Op, I think you should do what you are comfortable with. There is no golden rule to it. The probability of a younger woman being more fertile is high. but that does not mean every young woman is.



To be sure, you can see a gynaecologist/obstetrician with the lady before tying the knots.
Re: Marriage by ademotors166: 9:15pm On Sep 02, 2013
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Re: Marriage by ademotors166: 9:18pm On Sep 02, 2013
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Re: Marriage by ademotors166: 9:21pm On Sep 02, 2013
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Re: Marriage by ademotors166: 9:24pm On Sep 02, 2013
yellowpawpaw:



Y can anybody tell me what is wrong with this?(if actually its not hidden anyway)
No, you didn't say anything wrong. Its Well.
Re: Marriage by Kanwulia: 10:02pm On Sep 02, 2013
Thanks for 'considering' her!
She must be pretty desperate to deal with someone like you! If you see a woman as your ultimate 'egg-donor', you must have aborted a few OR MANY in YOUR 20s and 30s'!

What are you on about?
Afraid of KARMA THE SWEEET BYNTCH? grin

1 Like

Re: Marriage by babestell(f): 10:04pm On Sep 02, 2013
Then if you worry about her lack of thick skin, then you as her man should be her skin. You stand up and protect her when others try to make her miserable. Let people know that you wont stand by and let your wife be bullied, whether she has kids after 1 year or 10 years, if your extended family feel they can misbehave around her and get away with it because the husband is a weakling, then they will
Re: Marriage by afamgod(f): 3:47am On Sep 03, 2013
ademotors166:
I won't burden her with my own problems, but I don't believe I will be shooting blanks. Moreover I have started watching what I eat and also making researches about foods that build spe,rm counts.
Eeeeyaaah this man really need children. But op, u really don't need to afraid cos of her age. Its God that gives children. I know a lady who got married at age of 22, had her baby girl under first yr of marriage and 18yrs after she is yet to have another baby. While a lady who got married at 31 has four healthy boys and so many others like that.
Re: Marriage by Nobody: 9:27am On Sep 03, 2013
ademotors166:
I don't really care about boy/girls. To be sincere I could live with this woman Child or not. But, I fear if she has my kind of thick skin, to withstand insults or bashing if trials come.
To be honest, I go through a barage of insults now, just for being single at my age. And any spinster, is woed on my behalf..... you can only imagine.

Man i don't think you are ready for marriage. You mean your family reserves the right to insult you as they please because you are single? and you tolerate this from them? be it mommy or daddy nobody has the right to be pulling you down the way you are presenting it. This bashing you are talking about kai don't bring any woman into the situation it looks like royal rumble and a free for all at your wife if she can't produce the much desired and awaited heir.

I sincerely think you need to stand up to your family first. Be your own man before you attempt marriage even if the girl is 16 fresh out of secondary school and can breed like rabbits. You are not your own man you keep saying you are afraid the bashing she will receive and she needs a thick skin is marriage a battle field? which means your wife is on her own in YOUR own house in the event of any mishap you cannot offer her any cover from the storm your family may raise.

1 Like

Re: Marriage by ademotors166: 1:16pm On Sep 03, 2013
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Re: Marriage by temibobo(f): 1:37pm On Sep 03, 2013
Why dont both of you visit a doctor and run fertility tests to know if BOTH of you are fertile, BEFORE marrying and start shouting fire on the mountain if she doesnt get pregnant fast enough.

Please note that it takes time before a woman gets pregnant,men expect a woman to get belle immediately which doesnt work like that. It only creates stress,and stress has a negative impact. Secondly whats up with 30+ being old cargo, women can conceive till 40 yrs without problem. Some even after that age.So that means she still has 10 years to go and give you a few children if so desired.

Another one is make sure she knows her cycle as to calculate the best times to conceive. She should take extra vitamines called foliumacid, which supposed to help with getting pregnant. Not something from a herbalist.

Just my 2cents.
Re: Marriage by Nobody: 2:33pm On Sep 03, 2013
ademotors166:
You could have ignored the reply button if you didn't know what to write......

Yes i could have but i didn't want to.

1 Like

Re: Marriage by aniffy4eva(m): 8:31pm On Sep 03, 2013
@ OP
Just ignore all the posts that don't make sense. There are a lot of loose canons/little kids here on NL. tongue

About your question, your fears are not unfounded. It can be really worrisome, particularly if you want to be logical/analytical based on the facts. I have friends who got married >30 and have kids today. I equally have friends who got married >30 and don't have kids. C'est la vie!

Trust me, she's has probably also questioned her ability to conceive "after 30" and is building up all her faith, so i understand if you don't want to puncture that with probing questions.

My advice: If BOTH of you can handle it, BOTH of you should go for a medical check-up. You can tell her that you want BOTH of you to know for sure. Although it is not a guarantee that babies will come immediately after the wedding, it just gives BOTH of you some level of assurance that there's nothing wrong with either of you. And that knowledge will help your faith (BOTH of you), and will develop the thick skin in her. Please note my emphasis on "BOTH of you".

All the best man!
Re: Marriage by eagleeye2: 1:55pm On Sep 04, 2013
aniffy4eva: @ OP
Just ignore all the posts that don't make sense. There are a lot of loose canons/little kids here on NL. tongue

About your question, your fears are not unfounded. It can be really worrisome, particularly if you want to be logical/analytical based on the facts. I have friends who got married >30 and have kids today. I equally have friends who got married >30 and don't have kids. C'est la vie!

Trust me, she's has probably also questioned her ability to conceive "after 30" and is building up all her faith, so i understand if you don't want to puncture that with probing questions.

My advice: If BOTH of you can handle it, BOTH of you should go for a medical check-up. You can tell her that you want BOTH of you to know for sure. Although it is not a guarantee that babies will come immediately after the wedding, it just gives BOTH of you some level of assurance that there's nothing wrong with either of you. And that knowledge will help your faith (BOTH of you), and will develop the thick skin in her. Please note my emphasis on "BOTH of you".

All the best man!
Best advice so far.
Re: Marriage by ferhyntorlah(f): 9:37pm On Sep 04, 2013
andromida:
Man i don't think you are ready for marriage. You mean your family reserves the right to insult you as they please because you are single? and you tolerate this from them? be it mommy or daddy nobody has the right to be pulling you down the way you are presenting it.

This bashing you are talking about kai don't bring any woman into the situation it looks like royal rumble and a free for all at your wife if she can't produce the much desired and awaited heir. I sincerely think you need to stand up to your family first. Be your own man before you attempt marriage even if the girl is 16 fresh out of secondary school and can breed like rabbits.

You are not your own man you keep saying you are afraid the bashing she will receive and she needs a thick skin is marriage a battle field? which means your wife is on her own in YOUR own house in the event of any mishap you cannot offer her any cover from the storm your family may raise.

ademotors166:
You could have ignored the reply button if you didn't know what to write......

Mr ademotors166, you come across like someone who doesn't like being told the truth.

Everything andromida wrote is nothing but the truth. A man is expected to protect his family from the stress of external factors be it family or non-family.

If you can't withstand your people, how do you expect your wife to cope? If they can get to you(her supposed support and pillar), then what will be her own lot?

One thing you should understand about a married woman is if she's being pressured, she will transfer stress to you. I mean the house won't be comfortable for you too.

Please don't bother replying this comment since you don't like to hear the truth. Thanks for reading.

1 Like

Re: Marriage by ademotors166: 8:09am On Sep 05, 2013
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Re: Marriage by Nobody: 1:29pm On Sep 05, 2013
^^ You get time oh. undecided

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